Bad Mom Alert! My Kids are Night Owls and hate bedtime…

Yup, I said it. Bad Mom Alert! I mean most good moms have their kids in bed by 8:30. That means that dinner was done by 6 the kids were showered by 7 and Lord knows what time their homework was completed maybe 5? Good job mom! The truth of the matter is I would love to have my dinner done by 7 on a normal night in my home. Dinner at 7 is great, but it hardly happens. Bedtime by 9:30 would be a dream and that never happens. By society standards I am bad mom.

Night Owls just want to have a good time

My kids are “night owls” and they get it honestly because I am one too. I don’t know what it is, but I work better at night. I am writing this blog post at 1:08 am. I am fully alert and my creative juices are flowing. My kids are sleep and so is my husband. I can hear the quiet hum of my computer and the gentle snores of my family. PEACE! This works for me and I look forward to this time that I have all to myself. Some days I am so exhausted from putting the kids to bed that I don’t even use the “free” time to anything productive I just follow their lead and head to bed myself pushing all the things on my “to do list” to the next day.

I recently told myself that I have to work on the kids getting to bed earlier. Now my oldest wakes up pretty early in the morning so getting him to go to sleep at night isn’t that bad unless I have company over and then he slow drags and want to be in the conversation and procrastinates when it time for him to take his shower and putting on his PJs. After a few stern redirects he normally goes to bed with some huffing and puffing but none the less he’s asleep. However, the baby…THE BABY…is a full fledged party animal. He acts as he runs off of solar energy and doesn’t need to be recharged.

I can put him in the bath, give him milk, and sing all the songs ever made, but he will still be up trying to give me a kiss or a high five for no apparent reason. By the time my husband comes home its 11pm the oldest is sleep and the youngest is rushing to the back door to welcome daddy home from work. Now that daddy is home Chance thinks bedtime is when daddy lays down which could be midnight or later! Oh no homeboy it’s time for bed. He cries tosses and turns until he falls asleep in our bed (why he doesn’t like sleeping in his own bed in his own room is another blog post). By the time he is sleep Dennis and I are tired and irritated and ready for bed ourselves. No Netflix and Chillin’ for us. This happens about 5 times out of a week.

Momma’s got a brand new bag!

Well it did happen 5 times out of the week until I started a new sleep schedule this week. I just attended the WOW Summit this weekend and they were talking about getting kids on schedule so that our lives just flow better and I was really conflicted when I heard that because I knew my kids weren’t on a set schedule like they should and it was taking a toll on me. Monday morning I woke Chance up and got his morning started a little earlier than normal, we had a busy day, but nothing he wasn’t use to. He took a midday nap while I drove around running errands and when we came home I warmed up left overs from Sunday’s dinner made Dereon shower and put Chance in the tub. By 10:30 both of the boys were sleep. I didn’t want to get too excited, because it was only the first day of our new routine.

When Dennis got in around 11pm he waited for Chance to greet him at the door. He looked confused once Chance never showed. He asked me was Chance on the iPad? LOL. I proudly shook my head and told him both of the boys were sleep and I had a new schedule for them. He was impressed #MomWin. The second day Dennis came home and walked by our bedroom and saw a sleeping Chance, he gave me an high five. Today which was day 3 he came home expecting them to be sleep….and guess what…they were! This new sleep routine is the bomb!

My goal is to keep it going and stay on schedule as much as I can. I know we will have some late nights due to the Holidays, events, and just life in general, but overall I want this new routine to just be a part of our daily life. Because next year Chance will be 3 and heading off to Pre-K and I want him to be able to handle a set schedule plus I need free time to think and work and time to spend with my husband when he’s home from work and wants to unwind.

I may be looked at as a bad mom because my kids go to bed later than most kids, but they are well fed, bathed, and prayed with each night before bed no matter if its 8:30 pm or 11pm. We are working on better timing for the sake of us all. To those moms of “night owls” hold you head up mama, it gets easier. I’ll keep you all posted on our new bedtime.


Bad Mom    A Real Mom

16 thoughts on “Bad Mom Alert! My Kids are Night Owls and hate bedtime…

  1. I totally agree. I have an 11 year old…never had a bed time…what can I say he’s Jamaican! But, he knows the consequences of staying up late. However, as he’s gotten older and with many more activities his body gives out about 9pm on school nights.
    Here’s to Moms and individual schedules. Rock on your own time clock!

    1. A Real Urban Mom says:

      Kim, thank you! Girl it’s a real struggle getting these little ones to bed and still do everything you need and want to do. I’m glad I have figured out some sort of system…it’s a process. Blessings to you and yours.

  2. Definitely Real Mom. You just peeked into my night (literally last night). When I do get a chance to write, I often write at night & my little one is begging to be up. I know I need a new (read: consistent) schedule. #SignedInMotherhoodSolidarity

    1. A Real Urban Mom says:

      Yes! Sister unite! It’s a struggle but we got this!

  3. You are NOT a bad mom! The one piece of advice that my sister told me when I was going through this with Emma was put her on a schedule. That was best ADVICE EVER!!! Now having two children I put my youngest on the schedule as my oldest, but his schedule included a nap because he would act crazy. So now our schedule is bedtime for them (ages 5&3) at 7:30ish and I try to give them dinner around 6, even if our dinner isn’t ready I keep something ready for them even if it includes some of the leftovers from the day before and I make a meal out of it and some other stuff. Then bath time or showers and bedtime. The thing is when I finally got them on this schedule even on the weekends if they are doing the MOST then they will be sleepy around bedtime. They even know based on what’s on TV its getting close to bedtime. We usually stop electronics at dinnertime. But for us getting them on a schedule was the best thing ever, because if I choose to be productive or just sit quietly then I can do that without someone tapping me saying “Mommy, Mommy Mommy” LOL!!! And prior to the schedule it would be a world war at my house getting my oldest to sleep, and she still has her days when she gets in trouble but really by the time I am laying her down she passes out. Even in the summer, I let them stay up a little later (like 8 or 9) but that schedule is yearly for us! LOL!

    1. A Real Urban Mom says:

      I totally agree with putting them on a set schedule my first kid did it with no problem but the second one is different since I work from home my schedule is all over the place and since he’s stuck on my hip he tends to want stay up with me, but no more of that. Lol

  4. You summed it up – Real Mom. I work 5:30 pm to 2 am – so my baby schedule is everywhere. I wish I could say he’s like my other kids ( when they were his age) – but he’s not – so I can relate.

    The first picture in this post tickled my soul because that’s how Dylan looks when I think he is going to bed at a decent time.

    1. A Real Urban Mom says:

      Yes Dereon was on a set schedule and things ran smoothly. Chance had other plans for us but I will say that we are a work in progress 🙌

  5. Congrats on the success of your new routine with the kids! I wish you continued success.

    1. A Real Urban Mom says:

      Thanks so much love! Thanks for reading too ❤️

    1. A Real Urban Mom says:

      Mom win for sure! Thanks for taking the time out to read my bad mommy confession.

  6. I gave my kids bedtimes by about age 3-4ish just for my own personal sanity. Having three toddlers at one time required me to get a schedule together real quick! I’m happy for your accomplishment. The work it takes getting the schedule in place takes time, but it’s worth it. Then mama and papa can have one on one time.

    1. A Real Urban Mom says:

      I definitely need it for my sanity! Lol. I can’t believe you had 3 toddlers at once. Girl I wouldn’t know what to do. Thanks for your encouragement.

  7. Congrats on your new sleep schedule! Thanks for sharing your experience and what works for you. We need to hear stories like this, it gives us the freedom to be who we are as unique indivuduals and parents.

    For our family a sleep schedule is required! 😁 My older kids are in bed by 9 – 9:30p. My youngest 8p. 😊

    I need time to unwind with my hubby too!😉

    1. A Real Urban Mom says:

      Yes time to unwind is a true need and I’m just really learning that which kinda pressed the issue of this sleep schedule. Thanks for reading!

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